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Why Is It So Hard?

Why Is It So Hard?

Maybe you’ve been hurt before

Maybe it’s a childhood scar

Maybe it’s an ego thing

You’re not weak are you?

You’re not going to cry?

Tell me then

Why is it so hard

To let someone in?

 

You’ve built up these walls

Barrier after barrier

Defense mechanisms

You’ve devised

Emotionless face

Icy glare

Endless pit of

Nothing

Where your heart

Used to be.

 

They find you weird

Call you cruel

Sometimes it hurts

Sometimes you feel

Nothing

It’s been too long since

You felt

Something.

 

Emotions and feelings

Are the plague

You run from them

They’re uncharted territory

A treasure box lost

To the bottom of the ocean

You’re walking blind

In the darkness

With not even a cane

To guide you

Home.

 

You’re not weak

You’re not going to let them

See you cry

But inside you’re screaming

Yelling for help

But you bite your tongue

Because you think no one cares

That no one is

Listening.

 

Some days are fine

Other days it hits you

Hard

Like a punch to the gut

It leaves you

Breathless

You pretend you’re okay

It’s easier that way

But inside

You’re dying.

 

Maybe that is why

It is so hard

To let someone in.

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